A young male presenting to the GP with a history of anorexia nervosa, a low BMI, and associated psychological stressors. The mental health team has identified no immediate risk to the patient’s health. The patient has not met the correct criteria for secondary care referral. The patient has been discharged back into the community. But I don’t want you to remember him like this. It’s clinically accurate, but it’s not what I saw.

He didn’t “present”. I saw him walk in. He looked nervous. He told me that he had nobody. He told me that he couldn’t tell his family he was gay. The only thing he felt he could control in his life was starving himself.His “psychological stressors” weren’t a symptom; they were his entire life silently falling apart. And despite all of this, the NHS had looked closely at him and decided that he did not need any help.

This piece is my attempt to sit with the helplessness I felt when talking to him. A model built out of paper mache and clay, closer to the size of a young boy, mouth open, his hand reaching out for help. The plastic sheet shows not only suffocation but also the transparency of it all. The NHS can see him clearly. They are just choosing not to act. There are thousands more like him. He is not special in that sense, yet his life felt far too special to just throw away. Perhaps it is too late for this patient, but I pray that one day the NHS will have the power to support others like him.